hrrm hmmh hmhmhmh rhhhrrrmmmmmm

the worst feeling is ... waking up with minimal recollection or the previous night.
vague flashes of peculiar goings-on, smells and sounds, with undertones of rotting amusement, having long past it's expiry.
fruitlessly seeking the perfect high, feeling defeated.
refusing to give up, determined. until you recall the sickening lows you have to face.
a putrid miasma of love, loathing, humiliation and broken promises.
and having nothing gained from the whole decrepit experience.


the best feeling is ... realizing the only way is up after hitting bottom.
not having your mind reel in horror at every shadow you see.
no more fist-shaped holes in walls that you don't recall a reason for.
no more lightning and dark shapes behind your eyes and in your brain.
the walls staying put.